TheRealSpencer
Don't Ask Me How I Wipe Long Sleeve Tee
Don't Ask Me How I Wipe Long Sleeve Tee
Regular price
$35.00
Regular price
Sale price
$35.00
Unit price
per
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The temperature dropped. The standards did too.
This black long sleeve tee was designed for cold mornings in the woods, late-night campfire conversations, and the kind of people who own at least one folding chair that permanently smells like smoke. Across the chest, in bold lettering that reads like a confession and a threat at the same time, it says:
“DON’T ASK ME HOW I WIPE, BECAUSE I DON’T.”
Comfortable, rugged, and carrying deeply suspicious energy, this shirt is perfect for hauling coolers through mud, splitting firewood badly, drinking gas station coffee at sunrise, or staring into the trees like you heard something that nobody else did. The long sleeves keep you warm while the message keeps people from asking unnecessary questions about your wilderness survival methods.
Perfect for:
• 2am snack runs with the boys
• Fishing trips where nobody catches anything but everyone lies anyway
• midnight walks around the neighborhood
• Wearing one flannel all weekend without consequences
• Your favorite grandma or uncle
• Explaining outdoor “life hacks” that should absolutely not be repeated
• Backyard cookouts with the family
• Looking like a man who has survived both nature and his own decisions
Soft enough for everyday wear. Tough enough for complete nonsense. This isn’t just a long sleeve tee. It’s what happens when camping becomes a personality disorder.
• 100% airlume combed ring-spun cotton
• Heather colors are 52% combed and ring-spun cotton, 48% polyester
• Athletic Heather and Black Heather are 90% combed and ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142.4 g/m²)
• 32 singles
• Regular fit
• Side-seamed construction
• Crew neck
• Cover-stitched collar
• 2″ (5 cm) ribbed cuffs
This black long sleeve tee was designed for cold mornings in the woods, late-night campfire conversations, and the kind of people who own at least one folding chair that permanently smells like smoke. Across the chest, in bold lettering that reads like a confession and a threat at the same time, it says:
“DON’T ASK ME HOW I WIPE, BECAUSE I DON’T.”
Comfortable, rugged, and carrying deeply suspicious energy, this shirt is perfect for hauling coolers through mud, splitting firewood badly, drinking gas station coffee at sunrise, or staring into the trees like you heard something that nobody else did. The long sleeves keep you warm while the message keeps people from asking unnecessary questions about your wilderness survival methods.
Perfect for:
• 2am snack runs with the boys
• Fishing trips where nobody catches anything but everyone lies anyway
• midnight walks around the neighborhood
• Wearing one flannel all weekend without consequences
• Your favorite grandma or uncle
• Explaining outdoor “life hacks” that should absolutely not be repeated
• Backyard cookouts with the family
• Looking like a man who has survived both nature and his own decisions
Soft enough for everyday wear. Tough enough for complete nonsense. This isn’t just a long sleeve tee. It’s what happens when camping becomes a personality disorder.
• 100% airlume combed ring-spun cotton
• Heather colors are 52% combed and ring-spun cotton, 48% polyester
• Athletic Heather and Black Heather are 90% combed and ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142.4 g/m²)
• 32 singles
• Regular fit
• Side-seamed construction
• Crew neck
• Cover-stitched collar
• 2″ (5 cm) ribbed cuffs
